9. Implications of the past

The thing that now irks me is the question of friendship. It is whether to be friends, or say that I feel awkward around him, or just cut him off.

Talking to many people, they vast majority (no, I lie; all) say the same along the lines of 'what a jerkface, loser, bad friend.....' etc. The question that I am trying to answer for myself is whether I should be friends or not and should I say something.

The question of friendship is important because we were friends before. And, so far, we still are. What I have at the back of my mind is what kind of 'friend' uses another friend to get over someone, especially when they knew they thought of them more as a friend and was vulnerable. For me, simply put, friends do not use friends. Yet, I don't want to lose the friendship I have - but I still can't imagine myself being happy when he finally does enter into a new relationship. In that part, I would be as a lousy friend as he was.